Ancient Jewish Wedding 101
by JWing
If I were to say "Juliet on the balcony", any of us with a background in Shakespeare's plays would automatically understand I was speaking about romance. And if I were to say "We can just hop a plane to reach Europe.", most from our 20th century would understand immediately what I meant. Likewise there are certain background information that Jesus and the apostles wrote about and alluded to that was common knowledge of their time. As such they only made mention in passing to that knowledge as their readers from that time period would have understood. We however, over 2000 yrs later, read these same writings and are completely baffled, until we know this background information.
One of these is the Ancient Jewish Wedding process alluded to many times over, in practically the whole of the New Testament. This is because the Church is called the Bride of Christ and Jesus the bridegroom, better known as the groom (Eph 5:22-32). I will attempt to lead you step by step through the entire process and cite verses that apply to that particular step.
One of these is the Ancient Jewish Wedding process alluded to many times over, in practically the whole of the New Testament. This is because the Church is called the Bride of Christ and Jesus the bridegroom, better known as the groom (Eph 5:22-32). I will attempt to lead you step by step through the entire process and cite verses that apply to that particular step.
I have to admit that I've pulled from many other websites about the Jewish Wedding for this project. So don't be surprised if you find similar or identical wording on other sites.
Ancient Jewish Wedding Practice |
Jesus Fulfillment |
Marriage Covenant and Bride PriceWhen a young man desired to marry a young woman in ancient Israel, he would prepare a contract or covenant to present to the young woman and her father at the young woman's home. The contract showed his willingness to provide for the young woman and described the terms under which he would propose marriage. The most important part of the contract was the bride price, the price that the young man was willing to pay to marry the young woman. This payment was to be made to the young woman's father in exchange for his permission to marry. The bride price was generally quite high. Sons were considered to be more valuable than daughters since they were physically more able to share in the work of farming and other heavy labor. The bride price was compensation to the young woman's family for the cost to raise a daughter and also indicated the love that the young man had for the young woman -- the young woman was very valuable to the young man! The young man would go to the young woman's house with the contract to present his offer to the young woman and her father.
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Marriage Covenant and Bride PriceJesus came to the home of His bride (earth) to present His marriage contract. The marriage contract provided by Jesus is the new covenant, which provides for the forgiveness of sins of God's people. Jesus paid the bride price with His life. At the last supper, when breaking bread, He spoke of the price He was paying: "...This is my body given for you..." --Luke 22:20. Hebrews 9:15 makes it clear that Jesus died as the price for the new covenant:"...Christ is the mediator of a new covenant, that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance -- now that he has died as a ransom to set them free from the sins committed under the first covenant. Other Scripture references include 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, 1 Peter 1:18-19, Acts 20:28 and John 3:29.
The marriage contract, the new covenant, is described throughout Scripture: "...This is the covenant I will make with the house of Israel after that time," declares the LORD. "I will put my law in their minds and write it on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people... they will all know me, from the least of them to the greatest," declares the LORD. "For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." -- Jeremiah 31:31-34. |
The CupIf the bride price was agreeable to the young woman's father, the young man would then pour a glass of wine* for the young woman. If the young woman drank the wine, it would indicate her acceptance of the proposal. From this point on, the young man and young woman would be betrothed. Betrothal was legally binding, just like a marriage. The only difference was that the marriage was not yet consummated. A typical betrothal period was 1-2 years. During this time the bride and bridegroom each would be preparing for the marriage and wouldn't see each other.
*Note this usually was a silver cup, silver signifies redemption. This is the Cup of Redemption. |
The CupJust as the bridegroom would pour a cup of wine for the bride to drink to seal the marriage contract, so Jesus poured wine for His disciples. His words described the significance of the cup in representing the bride price for the marriage contract: Then He took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, saying, "Drink from it, all of you. This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins. I tell you, I will not drink of this fruit of the vine from now on until that day when I drink it anew with you in my Father's kingdom." -- Matt. 26:28-29 The disciples and Jesus drank of the cup, thus accepting the contract.
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Gifts for the BrideNext, the bridegroom would present the bride with special gifts. The purpose of these gifts was to show the bridegroom's appreciation of the bride. They were also intended to help her to remember him during the long betrothal period, as he would be absent from her. They were also a reminder that he wouldn't forsake her because the gift was of high value.
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Gifts for the BrideThe gifts that Jesus gave us are the gifts of the Holy Spirit: We know that we live in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit -- 1 John 4:13.
Jesus described this gift in John 14:26: But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. |
MikvehThe bride would next partake of a Mikveh, or cleansing bath. Mikveh is the same word used for baptism. To this day in conservative Judaism a bride cannot marry without a Mikveh.
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MikvehThe Mikveh, or baptism that Jesus provided for His bride was NOT baptism in the Holy Spirit, as that was for the apostles in Acts. Rather it is the baptism by water mentioned by Peter.
Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. --Acts2:38 |
Preparing a PlaceDuring the betrothal period, the bridegroom would prepare a wedding chamber for the honeymoon. This chamber was typically built in the bridegroom's father's house. The wedding chamber had to be a beautiful place to bring the bride. The bride and groom were to spend seven days there.
The wedding chamber had to be built to the groom's father's specifications. This ensured there was no sloppy job in the hurry to see his bride. The young man could go for his bride only when his father approved. If the bridegroom was asked when the wedding was to be, he might well say "it is not for me to know, only my father knows". |
Preparing a PlaceJust as a bridegroom would have reassured his bride that he was going to prepare a place for her, so Jesus told His disciples: "...In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also. -- John 14:1-3.
Just as in ancient Israel, the bridegroom could go for his bride only after his father approved, so Jesus said: "But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father. Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is. -- Mark 13:32-33 |
A Waiting Bride Consecrated(set aside)While the bridegroom was preparing the wedding chamber, the bride was considered to be consecrated, set apart or "bought with a price". If she went out, she would wear a veil so others would know she was betrothed. During this time she prepared herself for the marriage. She likely had saved money all her life for this time. She would purchased expensive cosmetics and learn to apply them to make herself more beautiful for her bridegroom. She wouldn't know when her groom would come for her, so she always had to be ready. Since bridegrooms typically came for their brides in the middle of the night, to "steal them away", the bride would have to have her lamp and her belongings ready at all times. Her sisters or bridesmaids would also be waiting, keeping their lamps trimmed in anticipation of the late night festivities. Otherwise the lamps without trimmed wicks would create charred black smoke that would putrify the house.
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A Waiting Bride Consecrated(set aside)We, God's people, are now consecrated, or set apart, waiting for the return of our bridegroom. We should be spending this time preparing ourselves for Jesus' return. Jesus used a parable of ten virgins waiting for the bridegroom to describe the need to be alert for His return.
"At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom...The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. The wise, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep. "At midnight the cry rang out: 'Here's the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!' "Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. The foolish ones said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.' "'No,' they replied, 'there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.' "But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut. "Later the others also came. 'Sir! Sir!' they said. 'Open the door for us!' "But he replied, 'I tell you the truth, I don't know you.' "Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour." |
Bridegroom Comes for His BrideWhen the bridegroom's father deemed the wedding chamber ready, the father would tell the bridegroom that all was ready and to get His bride. The bridegroom would abduct his bride secretly, like a thief at night and take her to the wedding chamber. As the bridegroom approached the bride's home, he would shout and blow the shofar (ram's horn trumpet) so that she had some warning to get dressed, made up, and gather her belongings to take into the wedding chamber.
Obviously the last shofar blast would be at the door of the bride's house calling her out. The bridegroom wasn't allowed to barge right into the house lest the bride was dressing, but would rather wait for her to come out the door before snatching her away with his friends and servants into the night. |
Bridegroom Comes for His BrideJust as the bridegroom would come for the bride in the middle of the night, with a shout and the sound of a shofar, so the Lord will come for us. Just like the bridegroom He would wait at the door of the bride's house (the air) and call her out of the house to meet Him.
For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord. Wherefore comfort one another with these words. But of the times and the seasons, brethren, ye have no need that I write unto you. For yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so cometh as a thief in the night. -- 1 Thessalonians 4:16 5:1-2. |
Seven Days in Wedding Chamber(under huppah)The bridegroom would take his bride to the wedding chamber where they would spend seven days. The bridegroom's friend would wait outside the door of the wedding chamber. When the marriage was consummated, the bridegroom would tell his friend through the door, and the friend would announce it to the assembled guests. The guests would celebrate for seven days until the bride and bridegroom emerged from the wedding chamber.
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Seven Days in Wedding Chamber(under huppah)Ancient Jewish eschatology taught that a seven year "time of trouble" would come upon the earth before the coming of the Messiah. During that time of trouble, the righteous would be resurrected and would enter the wedding chamber where they would be protected from the time of trouble. Today that seven year period is referred to as the tribulation.
Come, my people, enter thou into thy chambers, and shut thy doors about thee: hide thyself as it were for a little moment, until the indignation be overpast. For, behold, the Lord cometh out of his place to punish the inhabitants of the earth for their iniquity: the earth also shall disclose her blood, and shall no more cover her slain. --Isaiah 26:20-21 I will go and return to my place, til they acknowledge their offense and seek my face: In their affliction they will seek me earnestly. --Hosea 5:15 |
Marriage SupperAfter seven days in the wedding chamber, the bride and bridegroom would emerge and participate in a feast with friends and family. There would be joyous celebrating during this feast. The feast would conclude the wedding celebration.
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Marriage SupperJust as the bride and bridegroom celebrated with a joyous wedding supper, so Jesus and His bride, the church will celebrate the marriage.
And I heard as it were the voice of a great multitude, and as the voice of many waters, and as the voice of mighty thunderings, saying, Alleluia: for the Lord God omnipotent reigneth. Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready. And to her was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen, clean and white: for the fine linen is the righteousness of saints. And he saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God. --Revelation 19:6-9 |
Depart for HomeAfter the marriage supper, the bride and bridegroom would leave the groom's father's house where the groom had built the wedding chamber. They would go to their own home, which the bridegroom had prepared.
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Depart for HomeJust as the bride and bridegroom left the marriage supper to go to the home that the bridegroom had prepared, so Jesus and His bride will depart for their new home.
And I saw a new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away; and there was no more sea. And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. --Revelation 21:1-4 |
From the pattern of the ancient wedding practices, we see that, like the bridegroom of ancient times, Jesus came to the home of His bride for the betrothal, made a covenant with His bride and sealed it with a glass of wine, paid the bride price with His life and sent His bride gifts of the Holy Spirit. We, the betrothed (the Church) currently await the return of our Bridegroom to take us to the wedding chamber (the rapture) to spend seven years (while the tribulation occurs on Earth). We will then celebrate the Marriage Supper of the Lamb and finally depart with our Bridegroom for our new home, the new Jerusalem.
Are you ready to go with Jesus when he comes with trumpet call? Remember it can happen at any moment, with no events prophecied before it. The ONLY way to be truly ready for that call to "Come up here!" is to repent of your sins and accept what the Lord Jesus has already done for you by praying this prayer:
Are you ready to go with Jesus when he comes with trumpet call? Remember it can happen at any moment, with no events prophecied before it. The ONLY way to be truly ready for that call to "Come up here!" is to repent of your sins and accept what the Lord Jesus has already done for you by praying this prayer:
Dear Lord God. I know I am a sinner and need your gift of salvation from my sins. I BELIEVE IN JESUS, the Son of God, as my personal Savior. I believe that His death on the cross and resurrection provides forgiveness for ALL my sins past, present, & future. Please forgive all my sins and come into my heart and life. I hereby trust in Jesus FINISHED WORK alone, and NOT upon me & my "good works", as sufficient to make me right with you and fit for Heaven. Please forgive ALL my sins and come into my heart, Lord Jesus. Seal me with your Holy Spirit until the day you come to take me home. In your Son Jesus’ name. Amen.
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